As the Halloween season slouches closer and closer, I thought it might be time for a story.
It is a tale of despair, death, and despotism.
Of lunatics and rioters.
Of madness and of murder.
Of carnage…and of candy corn.
This is the Tale of Mad King Thorn.
When sunlight wanes to shadow
And mists fill nights once clear
‘Tis time to think of monarchs
Who visit once a year.
Mad King Thorn was once, 500 long years ago, a living monarch. He was a ruler of Kryta, known for a few things in particular. First was his love of jokes. Second, was his complete insanity. Kryta was in a famine during his rule (or perhaps, thanks to his rule), and while he held grand, sumptuous banquets, the people starved. This, along with the minor fact that he tortured and flayed a number of villagers, caused his subjects to storm his castle and kill him brutally with a carving knife. However, this wasn’t quite enough to stop him from toying with our world.Hail, Thorn, the king demented, Whose laughter fills the air Where cunning gifts are given With wit and deadly flair!
During his life, Thorn also had numerous dealing with the rest of Tyria, in particular Elona. He was known to have a contentious relationship with Palawa Joko, and married the princess Zola, who he later burned alive.
After his death, Thorn was placed in the Mad Realm, inside the Underworld, as its king. He is bound to this realm by a number of seals, which can in fact be broken. At the current time, Thorn is only able to visit our realm on one day every year, Halloween. Were these seals to become broken, he might become a more permanent fixture of our world. This is where the Lunatic Court enter. They are the Mad King’s followers and hope to break these seals so that their liege can wander Tyria for the entire year. Yes, even during Snaff Remembrance Day…
A petulant lord
And sobbingly roams.Helpless ornate shriek And serenely giggling knives You’ll laugh for your lives! Glumly impatient Smiling with menacing grace Maniacal face.
Death has changed the Mad King. His face is now a grinning carved pumpkin, his Armor black and shadowy, though it still bears some resemblance to the armor of the Ancient Ascalonian kings. He is most often accompanied into this realm by servant made of candy-corn, deadly and seasonally appropriate.
As this year’s Mad King’s Day approaches, after nearly 250 years of silence, Thorn’s power grows, perhaps even enough to make his way into our realm and deliver a sinister punchline…
Perhaps foreknowledge will save you, or merely let you know what murderous comedies await.